Mothers who Abandon their Families (excluding adoption)
It's important to keep in mind that not all single parents are mothers. In the last few decades, the number of fathers raising children alone has jumped exponentially. Where are these absent mothers? Where did they run off to?
I know it's confusing to have a dysfunctional mother, however, to be without a mother must be totally bewildering. Can you imagine what her children are thinking? How confused they would be!
I have observed that when a woman deserts her family, she is likely to put considerable geographical distance between them.
Why has she bolted? Is it another man? Many times it is. Is it because she is unhappy? How could a happy person leave her children? Is she selfish? Unlike giving a child up for adoption, it is not normally in the child's best interest for a mother to abandon her children.
Even if a stressed out or angry/abusive mother felt overwhelmed or lacking in parental skills, couldn't she get help to acquire these skills? Or at best, maintain close contact with her children?
As aforementioned, a lot of mothers who abandon their families, put considerable distance between them. If this is the case, it would seem that many mothers who choose to walk out on their children, have no desire to maintain close contact with them.
How would children perceive this? Most often, they would blame themselves. Children idealize their parents because it is essential to their survival. When they become adults, they still carry around this pain (mostly rage and grief) which is manifested in psychological and physical symptoms.
Children whose mothers have abandoned them, are guaranteed a life of misery and confusion unless, as adults, they become aware of their painful childhoods and face the truth (and the accompanying emotions) that their mothers are to blame for leaving. They must grieve over this loss that was too painful to face as a child. The loss of a childhood!
“Even if my father and mother forsake me, the LORD will take me in.” Psalm 27:10